Date:	2005-09-29 22:05
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	Tired, but doing well.
Music:	Nothing, I'm lazy today.

Well last Monday, I teamed up with two girls in my communication and interaction course and we had to decided a day to meet up to discuss the project. They agreed that Thursday was the best day for them and I said that I would be available. Of course, Max is a gentleman, and a gallant one at that. I had lied pretending hat I was completely fine with it since I don’t have any courses on Thursdays. So, I went from the South Shore all the way to Montréal (A one hour and a half ride). We discussed the project and then when everything was settled, pay for the photocopies, I told them my goodbyes and oe of them asked if I had finished my courses for today. Too this, I responded “I didn’t have courses today” and my partner seemed to have appreciated the fact that I sacrificed a bit of sleep to accommodate them. I left quickly to grab the next bus and managed to come back early enough. Max is kind, way too kind. This is the way of nerds.

Okay, on a more serious notice, I’ve had no time to relax this week so excuse my short entry.

~ Shadow Angel

Now Playing: Meteos (In the bus)

Hey, Internet journal,

Yesterday was a fun enough day.

I went to a Chinesse restaurant with Anton an Amel, two other college students after classes. I was pathetically deplorable with chopsticks but I ended up doing relatively okay after a while. I didn’t like tea to begin with but I tried it nevertheless and since it wasn’t too strong, it was tolerable, lol. The food was good as a whole but we ended up rolling dies in order to select numbers on the menu.

During my break, I watched the movie “The revenge of the nerds” and it was fun even though it was pretty outdated. Though I do agree with the title, nerd must rebel! Power to the nerds!! *Cough* Just… Forget what I said about a nerd revolution… Even though it is coming…

Anyways, I think that I’m slowly becoming my old “Don’t care about love, just care about success” older self. Good to be back.

Unskilful dancer:

Dazed by the graceful dance of your lips,
The thought of joining the dance slips,
Regrettably I am no trained dancer,
The thought of missing a step wavers.

However, it is a saddening dance,
A frantic mechanical trance,
Are you truly happy?
Or are you lying to me?

Listen to your heart when he calls to you,
He’s the only one, whom speaks true,
And no matter what you do,
Don’t let fear do the talking for you.

I would seize your hand,
Dance with you and try to understand,
I’m aware I don’t know how to dance,
But please give me this one chance.

Follow me to the dancing floor,
We will waltz to your favourite score,
And I will hold you when you are worn out.
You can rest safely in my arms, without a doubt.

Listen to your heart when he calls to you,
He’s the only one, whom speaks true,
And no matter what you do,
Don’t let fear do the talking for you.

If you teach me your dance
I will teach you my romance
Is this not a fair trade?
There is no need to be afraid.


~ Shadow Angel

Now Playing: Shining Force: Ressurection Of The Dark Dragon.

Date:	2005-09-17 11:23
Subject:	Har...
Security:	Public
Mood:	geeky
Music:	Hooobastank ~ Lucky

I don’t get it…

I was starting to think that Grace was a lost cause, but then she emails me out of the blue to ask how I’m doing. Women are quite intricate…

Anyways, nothing new, work, work, work… I’m bored but thought I’d update.

Anyways, I don’t have much to say.


How did you die in your past life?




You were killed during a mission or while trying to
protect someone and you died with honor. you
never regretted what you did and you are a very
brave and strong individual. You know what is
right and you are willing to stand up for it.
Even if it means death.


What Power is Compatible With You?

~*~Result nr 1~*~


Your power is: Clairvoyance

Explanation: Your power is that you can
look into the future and see what is coming.
How far and long you can look is all depending
on your skill level. This can, as all powers,
be used in both evil and good. Even if it may
seem like a boring ability it is a huge
responsibility for the carrier, becase they are
constantly tempted with doing the wrongs deeds
(e.g. cheat on a test). It takes high morals to
not be brought down with it.

Therefor you fit with this power quite well.
You take responsibility and do what is the
right thing to do. This does not make you a
saint, since you're only human after all. But
it makes a trustworthy person and you are loyal
to camrades and/or team mates. In school you
were probably a good student. If you were
social varies from person to person, but most
clairvoyant people tend to prefer their own
company or that of close friends and family.
That is because you are wise and knows how to
treasure the reliable in your life, since you
know popularity can be a false element. You are
also not that big on taking risks and prefer
what is already explored. That is because you
don't like suprises, they can turn out bad and
then you won't be in control.
Negative aspects: Since you're always
doing the right thing and being trustworthy all
the time you can become frustrated. Also, all
that you carry on your shoulders may stress you
out. You need to relax to be in good mental
shape.

Date:	2005-08-22 13:46
Subject:	Hero of Courage: Book one underway.
Security:	Public
Mood:	creative
Music:	Remember me ~ Hoobastank

Hello, Internet journal,

Well recently, I began working on my game's rough draft. I decided to begin the game with a secondary character and add a new feature. The main character's power can converse with the main character. The will be a mutual need of protection. Seraph, the power, will lend her power to the main character, in exchange, his body serves as a host and he must do his best to prevent the power from being taken away and misused. It's hard toe xplain in very few details.

Apart from that, I've been a little sick, but I had no time to waste on something so mundane. I needed to prepare for college. I got to go now, over and out.

~ Shadow angel

Now playing: Maple Story (I have time to waste)

Date:	2005-08-16 14:22
Subject:	Guess I'm getting better.
Security:	Public
Mood:	The usual.
Music:	Seed Ending ~ Gundam Seed.

Lately, I've been pretty occupied. When I feel bad, I tend to work my mind as much as possible, to forget. I've been working on changes on the Tales forums, beat a 20 hours game long in one day and a half called Riviera: The promised land (Ledah is cool!), been hooked to animes, especially Gundam Seed and only recently started sleeping better. You can guess I've been pretty tired lately.

Also, I apologize for anyone I might have been cold to... I might still be like this for a while, but please understand. I never mean any harm, I'm just a bit socialy inept.

Anyhow, all I do is work, work and work, because whenever I stop, I risk letting my guard down. I hate being vulnerable.

Anyways, on brighter news, Jason wants me to go with him to a trip to Ireland. My extensive knowledge of English might help him quite a bit and it will give me something to do. Besides, I'll be in good company. It will be in a few years, hopefully three.

Now I'm going back to work my mind elsewhere, no time for feelings, they get in the way, don't need them.

~ Shadow angel.

Now Playing: None, just beat Riviera: The promised Land.

Date:	2005-08-09 08:07
Subject:	Haven't updated in a while.
Security:	Public
Mood:	crushed
Music:	Ready Steady Go! ~ L'Arc en Ciel

My apologies for not updating in so long, I needed time for myself, time away from everything that reminded me of my failure.

Weeks ago, I asked Grace if we could hang out some day in an attempt to become more friendly with her and she seemed to think it would be fine. It took her quite a bit of time to answer back and she said that she didn't think we could hang out this summer. I think that the message is clear. I'm familliar with this sort of rejection. She probably thought I was some sort of loser and wanted to put her refusal as nicely as possible so she waited at the last minute and blamed it on time. That's what my personnal experience tells me.

I refused to let myself shed any tears over that, but my pillow sure took an awful beating. Inside, I wanted to burst into tears but I've got to be strong and go on with life. I can't let a single girl's rejection destroy me, even if heart-broken.

Oh yeah, I also continued roleplaying for a bit even if I wasn't really in the mood. The other players shouldn't have to wait for my recovery, that would prevent them from continuing the adventure.

I guess I haven't been myself lately. These days, I can appear quite cold-hearted, so excuse me if I say anything wrong.

You made me:

You made me smile,
When you deigned look at me,
Your grin full of empathy,
Set my heart beguile.

You made me nervous,
When I heard this mermaid’s chant,
I would heave, I would pant,
My mind being ambiguous.

You made me laugh,
When you were acting silly,
If I had know you were so chilly,
I would not have swooned on your behalf.

You made me glower,
When you brushed me off,
My dark mind would scoff,
I couldn’t feel and lower.

You made me hope,
When I lived in my illusions,
You gave me fear at profusion,
But now I’m here, I mope.

You made me cry,
When I learned I was nothing to you,
Don’t worry, that was déjà vu,
It was pointless to try.

Shadow angel.

Date:	2005-06-27 17:55
Subject:	Blunder, blunder and more blunder
Security:	Public
Mood:	Blundered
Music:	3 Doors Down: Going Down In Flames

Dear Journal,

You know, sometimes, I wonder if I’m really not as smart as most people think I am. You see, today, I seriously blundered. I saw Grace on MSN and I thought I could say hi and ask how she was doing. Though I had completely forgotten to change my signature with where I expressed a sort of depressed mood. When she answered, I was away doing something and when I came back to read it, she said: ¨You really don’t value your life, do you?¨. I feel pretty dumb for this since no one likes depressed individuals. It’s always been like this and always will be. You know, I’ll never get to be her boyfriend, no matter what I do. I know that for a fact and the thought even haunts me when I sleep. I thought I’d at least make it to good friends, which would have been victory enough. Of course, it would hurt if she said no, but what has to be done must be done. I might be shy to an extreme, but I’m not like some crazy fanboy.

I have nothing to lose but fool’s hope, that is, if I really am a fool. Anything can happen people say, we’ll see about that. When you blunder, you just try again.

She’s pretty difficult to get close to, I try and I try but get no results, there are two possibilities:

1. She is intimidated by me for some reason.
2. She likes me and is scared.
3. She is not interested.

I think it is the later as I cast the second option away and the third seems more accurate. I’d make further assumptions, but inside, I don’t want to know. Not until I’m ready to accept failure. Everyone fails sometimes, I know that, but I’m a well-known lout when it comes to girls. I can understand them, treat them like a true gentleman would… In theory. In reality, I always mess up because I’m so awkward. Anyways, enough ranting, I won’t get anywhere this way.

Oh yeah, and I spent the weekend playing the lumberjack with Jason. I helped him clean and carry large wood trunks at his chalet. It was fun, his grand parents were very nice and we worked really hard. I learned to drive a manual 4 X 4 fairly easily and for once, I did not get lost, lol. Anyhow, I’m short in time, so I will conclude here.

~ Shadow angel

Now playing: Fire Emblem 8: The sacred Stones / Final Fantasy 7 (Jason lent me his PS2)

Date:	2005-06-06 21:51
Subject:	Same old, same old.
Security:	Public
Mood:	nauseated
Music:	None... Going to sleep soon.

Hey journal, you whom isn’t actually a real person,

Well today was an okay day, even though I had boring courses. During my break, I’ve been talking to a bunch of weird but nice people from my college. Buck (Fred) whom walks around with a pirate tri-corn and a mantle, Max 3, the poke-master, Olivier, the guy who wear T-shirt colours depending on his mood, Renaud, the Linux lover who actually wants to become programmer for my game, Amel, the girl who thinks I’m weird but wishes to become one of my game’s voice actors, etc… We had nearly intelligent talks, and for the rest of the time, we just fooled around like a bunch of idiots.

Then I stayed late to prepare a Spanish oral presentation and when I came back I met Amel on my way and we walked to the metro together. We talked on the whole way then after we finished making fun of each other (Playfully of course), we bid each other farewell until tomorrow. Then my dad arrived and picked me up in the car (Red Grand Am 94 :P).

Anyhow, for Grace news, there isn’t much, I just asked her look at one of my poems in French for when she had time since I needed a quick enough proof-reader for an event.

Apart from that Jason, my best friend, is coming back next week, so it will be time to party! XD. (Actualy, I won’t party, exams first).

Oh yeah, and I pulled five all-nighters, staying awake for so long is bad for your health...

- Shadow angel.

Now Playing: Maple Story.

Date:	2005-06-01 15:29
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	angry
Music:	Saturos Battle ~ Golden Sun

Well yesterday was a nice day, I saw Renaud at college, this crazy Linux computer geek, came along to out little crashing place after several days of absence. Okay, I’m kidding, he’s not crazy. Actually, he’s a very great guy and I hold him in high respect beause we tend to be similar on certain things.

We were discussing and someone came by and told me that it was unlike me to act so serious. Then he responded for me by saying that I wasn’t being myself when I wasn’t serious. There was the social Max and the real Max. I confirmed that by saying that when I am in a group, I am rather nervous and tend to fool around even when I don’t feel like it, but people who really know me can see that I am able to talk calmly and think before acting. It was sort of nice to see that someone understood the way I was behaving, though it was no real wonder since he does act similarly in that nature.

Then I had my BESM game with Olivier as the DM and Pete, Jean-Sé and Sophie as other players. Of course, I was still using my Norton character that is plagued by an exaggerated shyness toward girls. I think that I beat a record for the worse dice rolls in history, lol. On a more amusing notice, I also witnessed the most incompetent guards ever. They couldn’t even see a big heavily armed cyborg that was standing right in front of them and Jean Sé managed to beat them in a five on one, lol. As for me, my character was thrown out of two buildings for drooling over two girls, lol. My hacker was useless this day.

Now on to the bad news… I heard that my neighbour was raped by a no good bastard. I’m actively searching for different services she can use to gain all of the necessary support she needs. Okay, I’m not on good terms with her brother who used to be a friend of mine, but her brother’s business doesn’t concern me. Anyhow, that cursed idiot might have just made the rest of her life miserable and I hope he rots in jail.

- Shadow angel

Now playing: No time for that! EXAMS!!!

Date:	2005-05-26 22:42
Subject:	Love project: Grace (Underway)
Security:	Public
Mood:	pleased
Music:	The true mirror ~ Guitar version ~ Baten Kaitos OST.

Hey journal!

I know, it’s been a long time, but homework is the most important thing these days, especially since I’ve been neglecting them.

Well, I finally sent my birthday gift to Grace. It was a collection tiger plushie with a note with a silly joke saying that this poor kitty had no home to go back too and that I knew that she would be able to take good care of it.

With it, there was an invitation to go to the movie theatre with me and watch any movie of her choice (Which of course, I will be paying for).

Then last but not least, there was a little card inside with a few drawings I made myself to the best of my ability. In fact, I actually spent a few days practicing using manga-drawing lessons sites to try and get the best results possible. The cover page was a drawing of me giving Grace a piggyback ride and the second one was a wandering swordsman, mostly to fill the blank, but also because I know she likes drawing. Also, I wrote a little speech:

"Dearest Grace,

Today, you have finally crossed the bridge that leads from your teenage years toward adulthood. As we slowly begin to cross it, we are hesitant, wonder if it would be more satisfying to remain a teenager forever. The fear of responsibility and autonomy enshrouds us and we wonder if we will make it through. This bridge seems to be extending endlessly toward the remote horizon and you tend to subconsciously believe that you will remain a teenager forever. Yes, this walk on the distant bridge of adulthood seems rather scary, but once your journey is over, you will not want to go back.

You just became a full-fledged adult and I personally am very proud of the wonderful person you have become. You are a grand woman despite your quite modest physical size. You have the potential to achieve great feats, which I hope to witness with my very eyes.

¨Grace¨ can mean several things, one of them is ¨a disposition to kindness and compassion; benign good will¨ and another is ¨ a sense of propriety and consideration for others¨. With such descriptions, I would say that your name fits you well. Personally, my favourite definition of ¨Grace¨ is ¨The short kind-hearted girl I met in high school

Have a joyous birthday,

- Max, weird forever.

Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter"

And of course, I could never let her go away without poking fun at her name and her small size. Though I don’t remember the exact wording of the joke unfortunately.

Anyhow, I sent the gift via mail and bribed the postman to give it to her on her exact birth date. Weird enough, she got it one day in advance, but hey, on the bright side, she got mine first, heh heh. Anyhow, when I logged on MSN yesterday, I saw her on and he signature said: ¨THANKS SO MUCH MAX!!!!!! I LOVE IT!! ^^ !!!! xoxo¨

That was definitely a good sign and gave me a good burst of confidence to begin with.

Then, with her hyperactive crazy talk, she said: ¨THANKS SOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSO MUCH FOR THE STUFFED ANIMAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!!!! lol¨ And believe it or not, there were three heart signs just before the lol. Now THAT was some blushing material. She told me that she was really surprised when she got it and that it really brightened her day.

Loyal to my habit of trying to be as virtuous as possible, but actually looking like a shy weirdo, I responded that there was no problem and that I was just happy that she liked it. The she told me that I didn’t have to do the movie thing because it was far too much and that the stuffed animal was perfect enough. However I responded that birthdays were not just about gifts but also spending a good time and that I didn’t mind paying for both of us, it would be my pleasure. And truthfully, it would really render me happy if she accepted.

Anyhow, after that, she disappeared like she sometimes do when she’s doing billions of stuff at the same time and I couldn’t get her answer ont hat. I hope that the next time, I can convince her for the movie. Well, I’m just glad I made her feel happy for a moment, that’s what I wanted all along.


By the way, today at college, I got into two humiliating situations. First of all, I’m talking to my French partner in the mechanical stairs and my shirt gets stuck in the rail and I get dragged upwards when I should be going down.

The second one was that I was working in teams with some girl in muscular training and Max 3 (A guy I know) said, loud enough for her to hear: ¨Hey, looks like you’re in seduction mode!¨. I am loyal to Grace, but still, it made me flinch. I think that I would have punched his shoulder if I weren’t occupied lifting a barbell.

Anyhow, that’s all for the massive update, later!

- Shadow angel.

Now Playing: No time for games!!! (Wasn’t E3 a bit lacking this year?)

Date:	2005-05-12 21:05
Subject:	Update: Too tired to think of an appropriate title.
Security:	Public
Mood:	tired
Music:	Supreme ruler of the nine heavens - Baten Kaitos OST

Dear journal,

Grace seems okay; I talked to her yesterday night before going to sleep and I did not hide my worry. She might think that I might be annoying, always trying to look out for her, but I did not want to take any risks, not matter how little the risk. Call me oversensitive, but that is how I am. The guy with a stone hard appearance, but inside, has a heart of gold. I am Mr. Worrywart and always have been. I hope she does not think ill of my overprotective attitude, my intention were good in my opinion.

Oh and I’ve been playing BESM these days (A role playing game), using a nerd-like character who is terrified of girls, here are the stats.

Name: Norton Mcafee.
Nickname: Falcon.
Age: 19.
Gender: Male.
Weight: 130 lb.

B = 5 M = 8 S = 5

HP: 60
EP: 60
AV: 6
DV: 4
Perception: 10

Dynamic sorcery 2 (Limited to Matrix): (5)
Heightened Awareness: (1)
Cyborg Body 1/4: (1)
Human-machine interface: 2
Damn healthy!: (1)
Highly skilled: (3)
Girl Shyness: (-1)
Attack restriction 2 (Girls): (-2)
Nemesis (Female hacker): (-1)

Skills:
Computer 2 (Intrusion / Security): (8)
Demolition 2 (Artificial structure) (4)
Medical 2 (Surgery): (6)
Gun combat 2 (Pistol): (10)
Forgery 1 (Electronic documents): (2)
Ranged defense 2 (On foot): (10)

Those in the negatives are flaws, taking flaws allows you to spend one more character point on a good stat. However, the DM will use this flaw against you. Basicaly, my character has a lot of flaws against girls, thus, if he was to be attacked by a group of bikini ninjas, his chances of survival would be slim. Anyhow, got to go. Here is a poem:


Temporary confinement:

Why have I imprisoned you away?
You whom always breaks free
Always comes back to me
It is simple dismay

It is not that I do not care about you, I do
Built of hate, broken by love
I cannot let you back in such state
What I am scared of?

I fear causing you further chastisement
You are much too sensitive
Which is why I keep you captive
It is to avoid your detriment

Once I take care of everything
We will once again merge
And you my feelings may finally emerge
Once there remains no dark badgering

- Shadow angel

Now playing: I’m reading right now! Read Bernard Cormwell’s Sharpe series!

Date:	2005-05-11 18:20
Subject:	Grace... Take care of yourself, please...
Security:	Public
Mood:	distressed
Music:	Speaking with the stars - Baten Kaitos OST

Journal…

Okay, I’m obviously not in a good mood today. I mean, it started out okay, with my psychology exam going well, getting a haircut (It was awfully long), and going off to the store to find a present for Grace’s birthday. Okay, I did not find what I was after but I found other possible ideas.

However, I come back home, do my insane amount of work and what do I see? Her MSN username says ¨.no Grace. no bad luck. no problems. *toast to death*. Toast to death? I don’t think I like the looks of this…

It is decided, I left her a message and I hope she will respond to me. If not, I will call to her house and see what is going on. I am not letting her harm herself, never. Not as long as I can do something about it. She is too precious to me and if she was to die… I don’t know what I would do but it would truly break my heart and I don’t think that I could never recover from it. I want her alive and happy…

Anyways, I know she has her little problems, but I care too much to just ignore such thing. GAAAAH!!! It is frustrating that I am unable to make her happy as much as I want to. I would give anything just to see that smile I saw in her face once in a blue moon, that true, shy, charming smile.

Fine, All I am doing right now is ranting like some common miser so I will stop at once. More news later…

- Shadow angel.

Now playing: No time for games…

Date:	2005-05-07 10:36
Subject:	19 days for Grace's birtday and counting.
Security:	Public
Mood:	crazy
Music:	Here without you - 3 doors down.

Dear journal…

School stinks these days and I don’t know if I will ever be able to catch up… I’ve been too lazy and I have the most zealous teachers I have ever seen. No offesne, but I am much more advanced in my intellectual development than my French teacher whom is still in the fourth stage of the Kohlberg moral development chart. This stage prevents objectivity and is all about plying strict rules without ever questioning them. I would be in stage six, the final stage where you are able to place priorities and question rules if something more important is at stake. Basically, I am more morally mature than most of my teachers and I hate that.

Anyhow, on the Grace department, I talked to her yesterday and she seemed awfully nervous since she had a Chiness school signing performance to do. I tried cheering her up a little but I don’t think I was able to do much unfortunately. I understand her stress since I would freeze in her place. I also learned that she placed second in Chinesse School, which I think is a nice feat. However, she is scared that she will not be able to make it to medical school. I wonder how much I can do to help, but hey, I will support her whatever she does. And I joked around telling her that as long as I was around, French was the least of her worries because I would help her as best as I could! Hey, maybe I can give her private courses this summer or something… Sorry for wandering off in my romantic fantasies.

Anyways, Her birthday is coming up soon and I couldn’t be more nervous even if the moon was about to crash on earth. I am trying to get her a present that would make her happy and still not know that I love her yet. I am a slowpoke at relationships but it is because I really want to do this right. I thought of a book and got several suggestions at the forums. Perhaps a sketch book and add in a plush animal. Tara thought of two movie tickets for Sin city, but I’m not sure yet. I mean she will probably prefer going with a long-term friend rather than with random geek-guy here. Many tell me I should just go straight up to her and tell her how I feel but I can’t, not now. I want to spend some time with her first. This is driving me nuts I say, NUTS! Inside, I was shaking in my boots when I was chatting with her!

Oh yeah, and my best friend Jason had been playing around with windows media player and managed to make a Legend of Zelda movie in French, lol. He will be coming back this summer so I am quite pleased about that. I was thinking of going off camping with him since he is such a nature and environment lover, lol. Jason sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G the tree! Okay, sorry, that was a terrible joke.

Anyhow, I feel like an insane weirdo who can’t think straight. I want to scream ¨Why me!?¨ but I am aware that there are other geeks in my situation. Any girls whom reads this, date geeks!

- Shadow angel.

- Now playing: Too much homework!!

Date:	2005-04-30 23:45
Subject:	Manga artist?
Security:	Public
Mood:	Lost
Music:	Starry Heavens - Day After Tommorow

Dear journal,

I have been working on making a present for Grace since her birthday will be coming in a bit less than a month. Surprisingly, I made her a manga skit to go along with her card! However, I am still lacking ideas for a present and time is getting short. I never really had to buy a present to a girl since I scare them like the pest, so I really have no idea what to do. If I really can’t find anything, I will hand her a bit of money. I knew she used to like drawing and meant to buy her a sketchbook and a set of drawing pencils, but she recently told me she lost a bit of interest in drawing. I am hoping it is temporary as she has amazing skills that should not be wasted. Okay, she thinks she doesn’t have much skill, but truthfully, compared to her, my drawings are worth nothing but stick figures. SO now, the mystery of the present is haunting the depths of my mind.

I also have been playing a role playing game on paper called BESM. I am playing a computer geek who hacks into whatever systems possible. This gives me something to do considering that I have little to no social life.

I’ve also been playing Metroid Prime 2: Echoes a bit, but I’m seriously advancing slowly. I have no motivation to play for long these days and often close the game before I make it to a save station.

Now I passed this test to find what my brain gender was, lol.

http://www.blogthings.com/genderbrainquiz/

Your Brain is 53.33% Female, 46.67% Male

Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female
You are both sensitive and savvy
Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed
But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve

What am I? The equivalent of a female tomboy? Lol! I'm a guy I tell you!

And here, pass this test!

1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. Do you have a crush on me?
5. Would you kiss me?
6. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
7. Describe me in one word.
8. What was your first impression?
9. Do you still think that way about me now?
10. What reminds you of me?
11. If you could give me anything what would it be?
12. How well do you know me?
13. When's the last time you saw me?
14. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
15. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?

- Shadow angel.

Now playing: Metroid Prime 2: Echoes.

Date:	2005-04-26 22:09
Subject:	Corrections once again
Security:	Public
Mood:	hopeful
Music:	Ephraim's route battle - Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones.

Dear journal,

Tonight, I just helped Grace with her French essay. She was on the topic of creationism so I tried adding a bit more information as well as correcting her grammar. Once again, I think I’ve made an outstanding job. I am very proud of myself and I am eager to learn what marks she will end up with.

I was really happy to help her, even though I seriously had no time to do that. Ah well, love is about sacrifices; I’ll find a way to catch up with my personal work like I always do. Grace is important to me and I will do anything in my power to make her happy.

Now I should already be asleep, more updates later.

A new poem:

A man loves a girl:

When a man loves a girl
His eyes shine like coloured pearls
They widen and sparkle
Mimicking the stars above
Tears of joy sprinkle
All he sees is love.

Love renders blind
For he becomes too kind
The woman may use him
He answers to her every whim
A single gaze can tame
Setting his heart aflame

Playing with fire is dangerous
Her voice sounds mellifluous
Be it bliss or curse
She holds his mind within her purse
It is all up to her
She holds the power

She can make him miserable
Until he becomes weak and feeble
But no one can put her down
For her he would drown
She can do no wrong
Never whom his heart belongs

He would trade the universe
Anything, he could traverse
As long as she lives happily
He could care less about his safety
His cheeks bashfully bloom
Could never imagine impending doom

Whenever you chat with me
I stutters and laughs embarrassedly
You are unaware of the verity
My lovely, lovely baby, please don’t hurt me.

- Shadow angel.

Now playing: Metroid Prime 2: Echoes (I seriously have not time to play games these days).

Date:	2005-04-22 20:48
Subject:	Mission accomplished!
Security:	Public
Mood:	exhausted
Music:	The end of a thought - Tales of Symphonia OST

If you read my earlier chapters, you should know that I have corrected Grace’s French oral presentation. Well in fact, I worked so hard on it that I corrected my very own corrections and even gave her some tips using French rules of all sorts followed by examples.

Anyhow, recently, she talked to me again and told me that she had gotten 100% in her oral presentation and thanked me for it J

Mission accomplished.

Apart from that, I’ve had a few more suicidal cases than usual and a few absolutely wanted to deal with it online, which is much harder than face to face interviews as I cannot read people’s body language via a computer monitor.

Also, my best friend, Jason, told me that he was coming back this summer so I was thinking of going off camping with him some time this summer since he’s such a crazed-ecologist, lol. I could even bring Grace along, I would be less scared with a friend around to draw some attention away from me, lol!

Apart from that, I have to catch up on a LOT of exams and I’m BEAT! I need to rest…

- Shadow angel

Now playing: Nothing.